Life Issues In-Focus - Codependent Relationships

Do you want to shift energetic patterns that hold Codependency and Relationship Addiction in place?

Codependent relationships are predominantly the domain of women who are engaging in personal relationships with someone who needs help and support. They offer themselves as ÔhelpersÕ and ÔsavioursÕ and turn into angry persecutors if their attempt to save the ÔotherÕ fails which is usually the case.

This dynamic in codependent relationships has been described as the drama triangle being played by two people who change the roles of victim, saviour and persecutor.

The term codependent relationship was traditionally used for an alcoholic and his or her partner but has lately been applied to a broad range of people who need help such as drug users, criminals, sex addicts, mentally ill, physically ill, and even workaholics who need someone to support them while they "do their thing."

Codependent Relationships are as much a cultural as a personal phenomenon. On the cultural scale, women get taught to be "good" and care for other peopleÕs needs more than for our own. As a woman, you usually did not get taught the difference between being good and codependent.

On a personal level, codependent partners have an obsessive need for affection, attention and affirmation that usually is the result of a neglect of basic needs for being nurtured, protected and appreciated or even worse, of abuse where boundaries got invaded and self expression threatened or punished.

If you wonder about the difference between being 'good' or codependent check the degree of involvement and the amount of pain you feel. Ask yourself:

  • Do you always "have to do something" to help your partner?

  • Do you feel burdened by the problems of your partner? Would you like to leavem and yet you donÕt dare to?

  • Are you holding on to your partner even if he has repeated affairs or abandons you while "working at the office"?

If you answer 'yes' to those questions, you are codependent and need to detach, start to manage only your life, and be good to yourself.

This is easier said than done. In my work with codependent relationships during the last 35 years I discovered that most people do need extra help in shifting the energetic patterns that underlie codependent habitual emotions and responses and in building up healthy relationship patterns and communication skills.

In my Ebook: Beyond suffering (Printversion: Growing through Joy) you will find a comprehensive description of the different stages of love with its own qualities and challenges to give you a broader view of the context of healthy relationships. You will also find a hands-on manual in this book on how to strengthen a positive Self


Dr Ulla Sebastian Personal Growth Resources
Stettiner Str. 3
59174 Kamen
Tel: +49 (0) 23 07 7 35 45
Fax: +49 (0) 2307 55 30 03

Other Websites and Pages (in German):

Kontaktformular | Bücher & Verkauf | Buchempfehlungen | Impressum | |

Copyright Dr. Ulla Sebastian / Visioform © 2004-2017. All rights reserved.

Copyright | Ulla Sebastian


Visioform auf Deutsch